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Serious question
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Author:  akdriverjd [ Thu Oct 13, 2005 4:55 am ]
Post subject:  Serious question
Alright, since 99.99% of you will never come up to Juneau, and I trust most of your guys advice, I have a small problem and would appreciate if you guys could give me a nudge in the right direction.

To be straight up, a good friend of mine (female) was "taken advantage of" last night by force. Now, it's all that I can do to keep myself from getting the clan together at 2 am and rolling on this bitches ass and making it so he never walks or has children ever again. I would love to do that, but I don't want to jeopardize my pre-law hopes or anything else. What should I do?

thanks
-jd
Author:  Flying Eagle [ Thu Oct 13, 2005 5:10 am ]
Post subject: 
If it is genuine in nature, take it to the police and make a complete detailed report. Get a doctors to certify it, or at the least go into the emergency room. Sounds like a small social event gone wrong or something, I hate the suspicion that is thrown on women if they don't come forward early enough on these things (assuming guilt on the males behalf). I'm not a lawyer but you hear about these "assault" things quite a bit on your American court channels and talk shows. Don't get yourself involved except, to be a good friend to your female buddy (assuming she wants to be close to any male at this point.) Get her to tell her parents, talk to anyone else that saw them together, basically map out the whole night, minute for minute so as to keep it airtight time wise. The biggest thing will probably just convincing the guy he did something wrong. I'm not even sure you/her should even talk to the guy in question as it is better to stay away from him right now. See what the police say about all this, and get whatever complaint/charge you guys want to put in. all in writing as soon as possible. IMHO this doesn't sound good if this is a clear reflection of what indeed happened by all accounts. :x

Stay clean and get as much good advice as you can from people you trust. I'm just a guy without a face to you right now. Hope your friend feels better soon.
Author:  MoWGLi [ Thu Oct 13, 2005 3:06 pm ]
Post subject: 
Personally, i would stab him in the face. I would'nt care.

Buuuuut seeing as you dont want to go to jail for first degree murder, i would say go to the cops.
Author:  Mechacode [ Thu Oct 13, 2005 3:29 pm ]
Post subject: 
She needs to go to the cops. It would be a good idea to hook her up with some form of victim counseling (http://www.rapecrisis.com/) right away as well.
Author:  Crackerman [ Thu Oct 13, 2005 3:31 pm ]
Post subject: 
i would highly reccommend following the advice that Tim gave you in the first response, but if you want retribution... ck your pm's.
Author:  MitsuDude [ Thu Oct 13, 2005 4:33 pm ]
Post subject: 
My better judgement would say take it to the police. But on the other hand, the law is very slow at any punishment. I guess you would have to say its the italian in me that would say go to the fruit and banana and make it known how it feels to be "Taken advantage of." But I wouldn't go off "hear/say." I know women can be very desprate when they want to be and if they decide to say something that isn't totally true then the matter could get out of controle or taken the wrong way. Just look at the possibility that she might have had sex with him but then realised that it was wrong and the only way she could make it right was to say that. She could have thought it was wrong because they didn't use protection, she might be scared she could end up prego, or maybe she heard that he might have an STD. Who knows, she also may be telling the truth. But with out actual proof there really isn't anything other then "hear/say" to go off of and thats not good enough. Was it at a party? was she drinking? did she get plastered? Statistics show that more then 80% of these kinds of cases end up being with people the victim knows. So more then likly she knew the guy. But like I said, friends and family have a different kind of affect on our judgement, if it was any of my friends or family that this happen to I would act accordinly to my judgement without knowing the truth. Not the best move. The best advice I can give you personaly is get proof befor you make any rash judgement. Or better yet have her (with a friend or family member) go to the police. This shouldn't be taken lightly.


Josh
Author:  akdriverjd [ Thu Oct 13, 2005 5:46 pm ]
Post subject: 
It was done in her own home while her mother was upstairs sleeping, 100% sober, one guy held her down; no party, she did not know the guy; it was a male "friend" of one of her other male "friends." She wouldn't make something like this up under any circumstances; the police 'should' be finding out about this soon, but the chances are that her boyfriend (my good friend) will find this fella and make him eat his food through a straw for the rest of his life.
Author:  coltTSI [ Thu Oct 13, 2005 6:17 pm ]
Post subject: 
First of all, I wish her well, this is a life changing experience and extremeley hard psychologically. We all know that justice in these cases is too slow and too soft on the guy who committed the crime but she needs to tell the cops and you and your friends need to be there with her as often as possible because the next couple of days are gonna be tough for her.
Of course revenge always seems like the best answer but let me tell you something, do you know who hates rapists more than you do? The guys in jail...A member of my family works in a prison and these guys will make him pay extra for all he's done believe me on this. Don't risk jail time for a piece of sh.. like that.
Author:  kjmerkel69 [ Thu Oct 13, 2005 6:23 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
It was done in her own home while her mother was upstairs sleeping, 100% sober, one guy held her down; no party, she did not know the guy; it was a male "friend" of one of her other male "friends." She wouldn't make something like this up under any circumstances; the police 'should' be finding out about this soon, but the chances are that her boyfriend (my good friend) will find this fella and make him eat his food through a straw for the rest of his life.
Let's not sugarcoat this event. He didn't take advantage of her, he straight out forcefully raped your friend. The phrase "taken advantage of" implies she was not capable of saying "No." She was sober and held down against her will. Sounds like he's a rapist to me.

For his sake, he better hope the cops get to him before anyone else does.
Author:  MattGSR [ Fri Oct 14, 2005 4:15 am ]
Post subject: 
Wow, this makes me very angry :evil: just reading about this and i don't even know your friend..i hope she get's through this ordeal. I seriously doubt i can restrain myself from picking up a weapon and inflicting serious damage if this ever happens to one of my friends. Did she tell her boyfriend yet, it might be a good idea if she doesn't yet until the alleged rapist is under arrest.
Author:  Silforty element [ Sat Oct 15, 2005 12:22 am ]
Post subject: 
i personally would f**k him and hes friend up too but the right thing to do would be to follow the law of course. one advice i can give is that if you decide to make your own actions is to be patient. dont let your anger get the best of you through wrong times...wait for a time and location you know you will have the most time, less if not any witensses, and be ready. let me just tell you this, simple fist on fist fight isn't going to do anything................on another note that i just want to say.....upon testing out paint strippers(not thinner, much stronger then thinner), a buddy and i have found out that even a slight drop to your skin is not exactly the best feeling in the world(i was wearing rubber gloves). i wonder what it can do if its been stuffed in someones mouth or poured on someones crotch.....? hmmm.........its pretty interesting how sensitive humans are yet pretty tough.....
Author:  socrateez [ Sat Oct 15, 2005 4:51 pm ]
Post subject: 
Go to the cops. Period.
Retribution only only puts you in the offenders shoes. It doesnt help your friend or her situation any at all. (at this point) The longer you wait to report this, the more it will look like its fabricated. Sorry, but thats the perception.
If your friend wont press charges... You do it!
Finally, if the law falls short on this one..............Eye for an eye. :axe:
Author:  colt-r-old [ Sat Oct 15, 2005 6:35 pm ]
Post subject: 
A) Get her to a hospital and get a rape test done.

B) Have her file a report with the police. MAKE SURE SHE PRESSES CHARGES. Girls are too scared these days to report stuff like this.

C) Don;t lay a finger on him. If you do, the whole case goes to the shitter.

I know a girl who was raped, when the guy went to jail...well...I'm sure you've heard stories.
Author:  The Ethereal [ Sun Oct 16, 2005 7:35 am ]
Post subject: 
Stay cool, when that guy gets out of jail you can still kick his nuts.
Author:  Mechacode [ Sun Oct 16, 2005 4:35 pm ]
Post subject: 
I'd like to stress the "get her couseling" part as well, she could snap because of this.
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